How do you spell that?

“Good morning,” the polite male voice said.
“Good morning,” I replied.
“Can I help you?”
“I’m interested in finding out more about what you do.”
“Well we usually have you come in and see us,” the voice began. “We like to meet you before the session.”
“How many people are in each session?” I queried.
A moment of silence.
“That depends on how many people are involved.”
“So you always have groups?” I politely asked.
I could hear the nod on the other end of the phone.
“Yes,” his tone was one of slight puzzlement.
“How often do the groups meet?”
“That depends on the needs and how long it takes for the issues to be resolved.”
I considered his reply. Well, I thought, I suppose if one needs meditation because of stress in your life then that is one way to deal with it. Still, a small voice said, surely meditation is an ongoing thing.
“Do you find most people only need a few?”
”Sessions?”
“Yes.”
“That really does depend on why they come to us in the first place,” his voice was less friendly. “We have been doing this for over fifteen years and there is never any way of really knowing what is required until everyone is together.”
The light still did not go on for me.
“So each group meets for the first time together?”
“It has to,” he was getting a little exasperated.
“And then each group continues together?”
“Of course unless we feel that it would be better to create smaller groups so that we can explore the core issues more easily.”
“You spend time discussing the issues?” the fog thickened.
“That is what you are paying for,” the voice was taking on a brisk tone.
“But surely this isn’t about talking so much as doing?”
“Doing? Oh you mean exercises?”
“Yes,” visibility up to two feet.
“We certainly do that but usually we find that it is only a part of resolving things.”
“And you find that things do get resolved?”
“Usually, although we have had cases that end up in court in order to be settled.”
I began to feel a nervous twitch developing in my eyelid.
“In court? Really?”
“Well not all mediation works …”
I gently replaced the receiver and sat back with light dawning on me. When slightly dyslexic it can happen that one reads mediation as meditation …. I considered phoning the patient mediation leader back to suggest that they incorporate meditation into their practices but thought that he might not pay much attention to my suggestions given the conversation that had just taken place.

On an end note I am not the only family member to have misread things. We have had one member inform me that a sign read "Danger Rabbits" - it actually read "Danger Rabies" but I suppose rabbits en mass could be dangerous ... unless you can outrun them. And then we have the delightful "Redemption Center" sign outside a grocery store which led someone to wonder why there was a church inside a supermarket - but that might actually not be a bad idea. Look out for the "Church of the Fanatical Consumer" at your local market. All donations welcome.