It's May It's May

I have a faint recollection of a song that included the lyrics "It's May It's May ... the darling month of May" and so I googled it and discovered that it was sung by Julie Andrews with lyrics that enthuse about the month of May. Here is my rendition of the song as I sit covered in calamine trying to ignore the itching of a thousand black fly bites!

WTF! It's May!
The bloody month of May!
The swatting month when ev'ryone goes
Blissfully astray.
Tra la! It's here!
That shocking time of year
When tons of wicked little bugs
Merrily appear to suck your blood!
It's May! It's May!
Those awful thirty one days!
When ev'ry maiden prays that her lad
Will buy a can of something vile
To stop the bloody mouths of crazy bugs
From covering her in unattractive lumps!
It's mad! It's gay!
A bright red display!
Those dreary days of slush and mush,
Have gone away.
Ev'ryone makes divine mistakes
By leaving the house in the lusty month of May!

Whence this fragrance wafting through the air?
Could it be the reek of DET
Covering limbs extreme?
Whence this crazy dance of waving arms?
Don't you know it's only the brave that venture out!
To plant in this crazy month of May.

(Chorus) The spouse looks out upon the scene
And wonders why the dance extreme
It's May It's May
The black flies love to say
"The weather's fine, it's time to dine
Because it's May, It's May
The delicious month of May!"

(More months and bugs to follow ... )

P.S. In case you want to try some natural deterrents here is a link:

http://chemistry.about.com/od/healthbeautyprojects/a/naturalinsectrepellent.htm

I haven't tried any of them but they sound as if they might work.